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A History of the Independent School Gender Project Presentation at TABS, December 5, 2003 -Ellie Griffin, Co-Founder, ISGP In 1996, thirty years after my initial foray into issues of equity for women, I sat on a plane traveling from Boston to LA and thought and wondered. A whole generation of women and some men had worked very hard to create equal opportunities for men and for women, to educate young people about possibilities in their lives, to provide excellent day care for the children of couples who needed others to care for their children while they made a living, How successful had we been? Do young men and women today believe in equality of the sexes? A number of things had been happening at our school that made me question just how far we had come. I am a feminist and had been since I was old enough to understand what "equal opportunity" meant. I had been very active in the women’s movement during the late sixties and beyond. Entering an independent school in the mid-seventies, where I was referred to as a "women’s libber" (definitely not meant as a compliment!) was a real eye opener for me. I felt like I had stepped back in time twenty years, when every question I asked about why the school did something in a particular way elicited the answer, "Because we’ve always done it that way." I began working slowly and steadily toward achieving a more equitable environment for girls and women, taking many risks along the way and trying to bring others along. For many years, we made progress, but lately, in 1996, I felt that we had lost a great deal of ground. I wondered if other women felt the same way. I remembered the fervor, the enthusiasm, the excitement of the 60's and 70's as we worked so hard, fought so many battles, tried so hard to develop collaborative strategies to provide a belief in equal status and equal opportunity. The question, "Are we there yet?" kept going through my mind on that plane. An image flashed into my mind, "travelling in a car, sitting in the backseat of the family station wagon, going somewhere, and in a plaintive voice asking over and over again, "Are we there yet, Mom?" It was an image that everyone woman understood, I realized, when I sent an email to numerous women I knew in Independent Schools. I simply asked that question, and 9 months later, 33 women and one man from 27 independent schools came together in Ukiah, California to examine the status of women and girls in Independent Schools. We had opened up a large can of worms and thus began one of the most fascinating journeys I’d ever taken. We met and talked, and cried, and ranted and raved, and questioned, and searched, and challenged each other. The emotion in the room for three days was amazing and powerful: anxiety, frustration, joy, sorrow, anger, love, fear… We had taken the first steps on a frightening and exciting journey, as we realized that not only were we not there yet, but that in the past years we’d all been taking two steps forward and being pushed a step back. Although progress continued in many ways, it was at great cost and with much ground lost along the way. We worried about our daughters and the girls in our schools. What kind of a world were we making for them? What kind of role models had we become? What were the messages that young women were getting from our society? Age quickly became a factor as we realized that the older women in the group were discouraged and the younger women were angry and cocky. They thought that they would be the ones to "have it all", whereas the older women had already been through the "superwoman, supermom" phase and knew the toll that it took. We wanted to encourage each other yet still be realistic about the costs. It quickly became evident that mentoring and role modeling would be an integral part of this project! Now, seven years later, young women are often feeling discouraged and overwhelmed. Kate Millet remarked, "When one group rules another, the relationship between the two is political. When such an arrangement is carried out over a long period of time, it becomes an ideology." When people see something for a long period of time, it becomes normal and accepted. Visual memory is our earliest memory, long before we have words and thoughts and the ability to express those thoughts and develop semantic memory. In the 1970's, my children thought that doctor was a male noun. In 2003, my grandchildren know that doctor doesn't have a gender. But many words still do have gender attached. "Ladies and gentlemen, … the President of the United States!" What gender image flashes before your mind's eye? The visual is powerful. We can try to teach through lecture, but educators have learned that words are not as powerful as images, and that it is what we live, rather than what we say, that makes the lasting impression. We have questioned what the visual is at our schools. If you've ever played the blue eyes, brown eyes game, you've experienced first hand, in a minor way, the effect of being "less than" simply because of a physical characteristic that really makes no other difference in your life. People of color in this country live this all the time. The visual: Picture a young woman. What are we doing to the bodies of young women? At lunch last year, another faculty member remarked to me that it seemed that we didn't have as many girls with eating disorders any more. Sitting in my job, I know that the opposite is true, so asked why he thought that. He replied that he just didn't see so many thin girls as he had in the past. I asked what the comparison was now, and as everyone at the table pondered that question, we all realized that the ideal teenage body is now so thin, that a girl has to be really emaciated for us to notice. Yet, I notice the numbers of girls who are cruising the salad bar at lunch with a small bowl, nibbling on cucumbers and carrot sticks as they quickly leave the dining room so as to not be tempted by more. "Thin girls are more attractive to boys," is one of the statements to which we asked students in our survey to respond. Ten years ago, at our school few agreed with that statement. Now, the overwhelming majority of both boys and girls agree. The tyranny of thinness: how many girls are sentencing themselves to osteoporosis because of dietary deprivation in their teens? Somewhere along the way, young teenage girls have become convinced that they gain power and popularity by becoming really good at providing oral sex to boys. As they get into later adolescence, they often realize that the power they thought they had has turned against them, and negative terms have been applied to them. As Susan Estrich says in Sex and Power, you can't rule the world from on your knees. Equality dictates that both people feel equally powerful in a relationship and in a sexual relationship, the needs of both are equally important. Consent and protection… simply because of our anatomy, we are more susceptible to sexually transmitted infections… yet girls too often accept it when boys don't like to wear condoms even for oral sex. In Susan Faludi's book, Backlash, she documents that every time the balance of power shifts and moves towards change, at a certain point, the powerful move to subjugate the less powerful, but the move is often insidious and isn't recognized for a long time. Is there a reason why women have become thinner, sexually objectified, less secure in opposite sex relationships? Does this eventually affect their belief in their ability to be anything they want to be, to aspire to being part of the ruling elite? This is an important question to keep in mind as we educate our young people. We don't live in a vacuum. Our schools are simply microcosisms of the larger society, but particularly in boarding schools, we have the opportunity to powerfully affect young people. We can make a difference. It's why we exist. What about the boys, we've been asked? As you will see, our survey has questioned both boys and girls, and men and women. We have the data, but in all of our schools, we have been unable to interest the men in owning the information about the males. Why? We keep asking the question, but we don't yet have the answer. The decision to focus on women and girls was a difficult and controversial one. Many of us wanted to study boys, also, and many others felt that if we focused on boys’ issues we would dilute the study of girls. Early in the process some men from our schools decided that they would like to run a parallel study to complement what we were doing. After the completion of the first survey which tolled boys and girls, and men and women about their perceptions of equity, a sub-group of our project met with men from a number of schools to give them the information we’d collected. They planned to meet in June of 1998 to begin the project, but to date, the parallel study has not continued. This raised many concerns in subsequent meetings of ISGP, but we decided that we had to limit our focus in order to address the problems and issues we’d discovered which pertained to girls and women. Nonetheless, throughout the project, we’ve looked at boys and men in relation to women In the late "70's, Jean Baker Miller, in her book, Towards a New Psychology of Women, commented that the powerless know more about the powerful than the powerful know even about themselves. The women in our project want the boys and girls in our schools to understand about each other, to desire to know all about each other, and to feel on an equal basis. We hope that by developing that interest and understanding, that we can also develop respect. If young men are objectifying young women, then helping young women to become more assertive and self-confident is only half the answer. Looking at the disempowered, provides a mirror from which to view the empowered from a different angle. That mirror has provided many interesting insights.
We now have both a cross-sectional and a longitudinal look at boys and girls in our schools. We can see how they have or have not changed in four years their attitudes and perceptions about many issues. We've been working hard to understand the data and to begin to develop initiatives at our schools to address the problems that we see. (In the next session, you can hear from women in two schools who have worked hard to develop programs and change attitudes.) The results of the survey happily surprised us in some areas, and discouraged us in others. We have a great deal of information, both from the national survey and for our own schools. We'd like to share with you now, some what we have learned over the past 7 years. As you watch and listen to Cheryl Jenkins' PowerPoint presentation, think about your school. Think about the messages that your students are hearing and seeing, the lessons they are learning about themselves and each other every day from the way that your school addresses these issues. We hope that you, too, will be inspired to consider new ways to instill confidence, self-esteem and empathy in the boys and girls in your schools.
The Independent School Gender Project Notes from Presentation at TABS, December 5, 2003 "Strategies for Change"
TABS PRESENTATION, DEC 5, 2003 "COLLABORATION: The Process of Change at One School" NANCY BIRD - Hotchkiss School At the risk of simplifying just how we have used the gender project and the ISGP study as a tool for change, I will throw out a single word, COLLABORATION. I could go on at length about the gender significance of this word–but I won’t. What I will do is try to illustrate in a nutshell how Nancy and I have used a model of collaboration to increase understanding of gender issues in our school community. The ISGP data gave us a kicking off point to raise questions and gather additional information on gender issues at Hotchkiss. Over time we have been able share our findings with a variety of audiences, most recently our board of trustees. It is our hope that we have caught the attention of those in our school positioned to make both simple and significant changes that will benefit everyone in our community. This has not been an overnight process, as you will see in the timeline that follows. What steps have we taken? One: Nancy and I were sent to the first meeting of the ISGP as a team. We have watched others who participated in the ISGP study struggle back at their schools because they felt alone…the challenges were too great. We also quickly realized that a team of two would not be able to accomplish all that was expected. We asked women to help us–we chose only women because early on in the process of our work we recognized that the women at our school were looking for ways to interact and support one another. We hoped that we could put them to work together and provide support at the same time. It worked! Two: Our women and girls study group worked by our sides for the next two years. They guided our choices of programs, helped us with the pilot project, and worked with our girls to identify issues that were important to them. The group helped us with the first round of data collection, helped us examine and interpret the data, and gave us support and advice as we tackled the next step…sharing the data. We started with the administrative group and presented the findings. We were asked to present the data to our alums, it was our 25th anniversary of coeducation. All of this took place in an atmosphere of sharing and support from this group of women. Three: We presented the data to our faculty. Our women’s study group had decided that it needed to become more inclusive… our study group went co-ed. We worked with this group for a year. This broadened our discussions and increased the community’s knowledge of our work. In all honesty…it also complicated our work as we tried to define what issues to take on and how. Collaboration can be challenging and can be slow! Four: A small group of female students became very interested in the work of the ISGP and wanted to establish a student club that focused on gender. They kicked off their club with a student presentation of the ISGP student data. Once again our collaborative group had grown. Now we had students working with us! Currently, this group is governed by equals rather than chairs–two girls each from the sophomore, junior and senior class. Their name Bluestockings, has become synonymous with gender and girls at Hotchkiss. Five: The core collaborative group--the national study group of the ISGP is not really a step, it is the ultimate model of collaborative work. Each year, Nancy and I were and are energized, guided, and supported by this group to keep working on this project. We gained insight into our challenges, shared methods to deal with these challenges, and reflected on the importance of the work we were doing. We are amazed by what we can accomplish and do as a group. In fact, I have been told that we are currently working on a book…as if the study wasn’t enough! Six: It was time for more formalized collaboration. Gender discussions at Hotchkiss seemed to be stuck in the work of the ISGP. A proposal to establish a faculty and student elected gender committee was accepted. The committee began its work late last fall. This coed group of faculty and students has reviewed the ISGP data with us, collected additional data, and has begun to make recommendations to the administration. The group was instrumental in organizing a presentation to our board of trustees this fall. Their voices were heard and we are currently preparing additional information and suggestions for the Feb. board meeting. Seven: The four women on our board of trustees have joined us to help with the organization and funding of a national conference for girls and women that Hotchkiss will host this summer. They are interested in networking with alums and other female board members. This has become our newest and most exciting collaborative group. There are several strategies that Nancy and I have used as we worked use the ISGP as a tool for change at Hotchkiss.
"ANOTHER PERSPECTIVE ON THE PROCESS OF CHANGE" NANCY GAYNOR - The Hotchkiss School Putting together the timeline was actually a fascinating exercise for us. Not only were we better able to see what we have done as a result of our involvement with the ISGP, but the twists and turns of the process became more apparent. Looking at the whole picture put a certain order and logic to what has sometimes felt like a slow, not always clear, journey. I’m going to talk about some of the specific programs we have designed in response to the data we have collected and the impact these have had on the community. As Nancy has made clear, any success we have had has been due to working collaboratively. I would say the other primary factor has been keeping things simple. As you all know, adding more responsibilities or projects to our busy jobs is challenging, so simplicity has been a key component. Our efforts have been both informal and formal, grassroots and from the top, big and small, direct and indirect. Some of what we’ve done has involved discussions with a small group, while other endeavors, such as the school’s celebration of its 25th year of co-education, have involved the entire community. Looking at the last 7 years, it is clear that all have contributed to a heightened awareness of gender equity and an increased willingness to make appropriate changes in our community. And more importantly, a growing number of initiatives coming from different directions. As always, change can seem very slow in coming, but we have seen the momentum build as we keep hammering away at our gender stuff with both adults and students. While we are still lacking significant numbers of women in visible leadership positions, last year there were more women than men hired;.a direct result of the attention paid to the lower numbers of women on our faculty and a growing recognition that many students graduate having had very few (if any) female teachers. Just this fall, our headmaster accepted the recommendation to change his title to Head. The dining hall tables have been rearranged to eliminate the large group of male varsity athletes sitting together at the entrance. Change can happen. The results of the pilot study reflected a strong desire and need for younger students to be talking more with older students. We set up a forum for freshman girls and senior girls to talk in small groups with one another…..asking questions and giving advice. Not only did this help pull in the younger girls, but it helped strengthen the older girls’ awareness of their importance as role models. This has now become an ongoing program that we do twice a year. The format is simple……(explain) This event also inspired our 11th grade girls last year to reinstate a Big Sister/Little Sister program for new students. The data collected from the study has indicated an unhealthy attitude among the girls toward body image, which seems to increase as they get older. In response to this, we invited 9th and 10th grade girls to watch the video of Mary Pipher’s Reviving Ophelia, and followed with small discussion groups. While this certainly didn’t solve all of our problems with eating issues, it did give the girls a sense of the power of connection and heighten their interest in supporting each other. Last year we began an affiliation with Touchstone, a nearby residential facility for girls in the juvenile justice system. Once a month, we bring together a small group of our girls and a group of girls from Touchstone. We spend time doing structured writing exercises and reading our work to each other. This has been an incredible experience for all involved. The opportunities for mentoring and broadening perspectives continue to grow. There have been a increasing number of dorm programs designed in response to the growing awareness of a variety of issues……the need for connection with girls, developing healthier lifestyles, living together. These have ranged from simple nail painting parties to full fledged evenings with skits and discussion groups. There have been questions along the way as to when we might provide similar opportunities for the boys. Our response has been to encourage others (men) to take that on. It is interesting to note that, thus far, no action has been taken and we believe that a different approach would be more effective for the boys. As Nancy pointed out, we have always worked with a group when putting together any of the programs. In doing so, the process became as important as the work we were doing. Our meetings provided an opportunity for younger and older faculty to strengthen their connections. While exploring the issues, adults with a broad range of age and experience were creating a network of support for each other. Projects got organized and executed while mentoring occurred naturally along the way. Last spring, a young woman on our faculty got the ball rolling to resurrect a group for women in the community. While the group continues to wrestle some with direction, focus and forum, we have already seen its impact. There is a significant increase in the dialogue among women, raising issues and questions, sharing information. We have found that it is more challenging to formalize our efforts with the adult population. Programs might require funding, administrative support, and/or policy change. But what has been exciting to us, is the evidence that efforts to address gender equity issues are now coming from many directions. Awareness grows and there is a healthy, necessary feeling of unrest bubbling to the surface. TIMELINE FOR ISGP PROGRESS AT HOTCHKISS SCHOOL
WHAT IS THE INDEPENDENT SCHOOL GENDER PROJECT What is the Independent School Gender Project? The mission of the Independent School Gender Project was established in 1997 to "create a framework of research, assessment, and strategies for change through which schools can address gender based practices and attitudes effecting girls and women in order to promote whole and healthy environments for both females and males in our schools." What has been the format of the study? The group has incorporated the following goals in implementing the study:
How often does the group meet and what do you do at your meetings? Our yearly meetings last three days and involve an amazing amount of work, conversation and collaboration. As summarized by Cheryl Sanford Jenkins in her introduction to the Pilot Study, "During these first two years, discussion focused on identifying topics of concern for girls and women in Independent Schools and assessing the perceptions of girls and women regarding their Independent School experiences. These discussions culminated in draft questionnaires that were administered in a select group of participating schools in November of 1998. The purpose of the pilot questionnaire was threefold. First, it was necessary to examine the technical characteristics of the survey instruments in order to assure the reliability, validity and usefulness of the data gathered. Second, the pilot study would provide some actual, although preliminary, data with which to focus the further discussions of the group. Last, these preliminary results would assist in stimulating interest in the study of gender issues in independent schools. " The pilot questionnaire assessed attitudes and experiences for students related to gender in the areas of leadership, role models, residential concerns, relationships, school rules, sexuality, body image, academics, athletics, health and stress. For faculty, issues of leadership, relationships with students, integrating personal and professional life and compensation equity were assessed. "Ultimately, the goal of the group was to survey a broader sample of students and adults in each school to compare the experiences of females and males and reach quantified conclusions about gender equity in Independent Schools. Such results will provide insight into specific issues that may need to be addressed, as well as inform a course of action that will assist individual schools as they continue to develop as thriving school communities." (Jenkins) How long will the study last? Over the next three years, the women and girls, and men and boys will complete a five-year longitudinal study using the questionnaires and a series of anecdotal discussion groups. Data was collected and recorded for 9th and 12th graders for the year 2000 and will be collected again in 2004. Female and male participants will complete a personal profile and all participating schools will complete a comprehensive Gender Self-Study. Part of the valuable networking of the project includes the sharing of gender-related projects and programs at our individual schools many that have come out of our participation in the Gender Project. While the Project definitely has a mind of its own, we will summarily end with a written account of the study and its findings as well as a Ten Point Strategy for implementing these findings. We also hope to put together a final workshop or conference on the Gender Project that will include students, parents and other schools. What have you discovered so far? We discovered many interesting perceptions and attitudes. For instance, the majority of students when questioned about whether they would report incidents of racial harassment said that they would report it. However, only a minority of students said that they would report incidents of sexual harassment, and fewer 12th graders than 9th graders said they would report. Among the adults surveyed, the majority of men felt that they were able to balance their personal life, their professional life and their health, while only a minority of women agreed. Not surprising, body image and dieting is a cause of real concern for girls in our schools. In most schools, women believe that they are being paid less than men for comparable work are. Do you expect things to change? We hope that by bringing issues to light and informing ourselves about the concerns that girls and women, boys and men in our schools share that we can determine effective ways to address inequities. We believe that a healthy society is an equitable society. We want our schools to be safe and healthy environments for all to learn and grow. Which schools have participated in the study? Albuquerque Academy, New Mexico Cate School, California Choate Rosemary Hall, Connecticut Dana Hall School, Massachusetts Deerfield Academy, Massachusetts Hawaii Preparatory Academy, Hawaii Hotchkiss School, Connecticut Kent School, Connecticut Lakefield College School, Ontario Loomis Chaffee School, Connecticut Milton Academy, Massachusetts Miss Porter’s School, Connecticut The Rivers School, Massachusetts Saint Mary’s School, North Carolina Shattuck-St. Mary’s, Minnesota St. Marks School, Massachusetts St. Stephen’s School, Texas Suffield Academy, Connecticut Tabor Academy, Massachusetts Verde Valley School, Arizona Walnut Hill School, Massachusetts Wasatch Academy, Utah When can my school participate in the study? After the survey is re-administered to the students and faculty at the original schools in the fall of 2004, the survey instrument and directions for administration will be made available to interested schools. CONTACT cheryl@humandevelolpmentinstitute.org for more information. How can I learn more about the study? For more information, contact us at: ellie@humandevelopmentinstitute.org or carol@humandevelopmentinstitute.org
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